The Teacher’s Hidden Hope – Extended Epilogue

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One year later

“Clara?” she heard Levi call from the sitting room.

“Yes?” she called back. She stood at the stove stirring the cranberry sauce for Christmas dinner.

“Do you know where your father put the wood he cut the other night?” Levi asked, coming into the kitchen so they didn’t have to keep shouting to each other. “I told him to just put it beside the hearth, but it isn’t there. Where else would he have put it?”

“Goodness knows,” Clara said, shaking her head. “My father is a good man, but he’s so forgetful that I often wonder how he manages to be such a good deputy.”

“I think it’s because he’s on his best behavior when he is working,” Levi offered. “When he doesn’t have to focus as hard, things just fall by the wayside.”

“I suppose you’re right,” Clara said with a smile. 

Levi came up and gave her a kiss. Although they’d been married for a little over half a year now, it still sent a thrill through Clara every time their lips touched. She couldn’t believe she was lucky enough to get to be the woman to marry Levi Barrett.

“Merry Christmas!” 

The loud call came from beyond the front door, so Levi went to open it. He returned a moment later with Frank and Ruth, who was holding their newborn daughter, Phoebe, in her arms. Clara rushed to hug her dearest friend, then turned her attention to the child in her arms.

“Just when I think she can’t get more beautiful, she does,” Clara whispered, gently stroking the little one’s nose. Phoebe scrunched up her face as though it tickled and the two women sighed over how utterly adorable she was. 

Frank and Levi were lost in conversation already, so Ruth pulled Clara close and whispered, “And just think how cute yours will be!”

Clara gasped quietly and shushed her friend. “Don’t say that so loudly! I still haven’t told Levi!”

“You haven’t?” she hissed at Clara. “Why not?”

“I’m just waiting for exactly the right time,” Clara said, continuing to fuss with all the food bubbling on the stove. “And I haven’t found it yet.”

Ruth’s expression suddenly softened. She grabbed her friend’s hand and led her out of the room so that they could talk more privately. When they were in the sitting room, Ruth put a kind hand on her arm and said, “Oh, Clara. Do you not want to tell him because… You’re worried you might lose this one, too?”

Clara hadn’t thought her concern would be that easy to read. It had been three months since she’d discovered she was no longer pregnant with their first child, and she was still devastated by the loss.

“I’m… I’m better since I talked with Dr. Finch about it,” Clara confided in her friend. “He told me it’s not uncommon for a woman to lose her first pregnancy. But I keep feeling like I did something wrong, something that caused me to lose our first child. What if I’m being punished for something, Ruth?”

Ruth adamantly shook her head. “No, absolutely not, Clara. The Lord knows you have nothing to be punished for, and He certainly did not send you that trial because he felt you deserved it. I am so sure you are going to have no problems with this little one, Clara. How have you been feeling?”

“Just terrible, to tell you the truth,” Clara said. “I’m nauseous all the time, and I wasn’t sick at all when I was pregnant before. I’m worried it’s a bad sign.”

Ruth took her hand and squeezed it tightly. “Not in the least! So many things made me sick when I was first pregnant with Phoebe. I could catch a whiff of sun-warmed hay and it would send me running for the outhouse!”

Clara looked at her in surprise. “Hay? Really? Well, I’m sorry you had to go through that, but that’s very reassuring to hear. I feel like whenever I smell any food, my stomach tells me it’s time to lose my lunch!”

“It will get better with time,” Ruth told her. “But there are many other ‘joys’ that come along with being pregnant, so you may have to steel yourself. It will all be worth it in the end, though. You and Levi will have the most wonderful child, I just know it!”

They returned to the kitchen, and when the smell of the Christmas meal hit Clara’s nostrils, she immediately felt like she needed to vomit. But she managed to get it under control.

There was another knock at the door and Tommy, Velma, and William arrived along with Eleanor and Harold.

“It’s so nice to have everyone here!” Levi welcomed them. “Come on, let’s go get you all seated. Would anyone like anything to drink?”

Clara was so grateful that Levi was handling the hosting, because with the way she was feeling, she could hardly stand at the stove. Everyone, except for her mother, shuffled out into the sitting room, leaving the two women alone.

Eleanor came over and placed a tender hand on her daughter’s abdomen. “How is the little one faring? Are they treating you kindly? You made me feel very ill for the first three months of my pregnancy, Clara.”

“I did?” she asked. “Oh, that’s so good to hear! Well, no, not really, I suppose. I’m sorry I made you sick, but that’s exactly how I’m feeling!”

“That’s wonderful news!” Eleanor cheered excitedly. “And when did you tell Levi?”

Clara winced. “Uh… I… haven’t yet?”

“Oh, Clara!” her mother gently chastised her. “You have to tell him. Don’t leave him in the dark! He is going to be just thrilled that you’re bringing a little one into the world together. Don’t you want to tell him?”

“I do, it’s just…” She trailed off, unsure of how to express her feelings to her mother. Talking to Ruth was one thing, but talking to Eleanor about it was something else entirely. 

“You don’t want to tell him and then have… something bad happen again?” Eleanor asked gingerly.

Clara nodded. “I feel like I let Levi down so much the last time when it happened.”

Eleanor took both her daughter’s hands. “No, no, please don’t think that for a moment, my dear! Levi was sad, just as you were, but you didn’t let him down at all. You did everything you could to bring that baby into the world. Something about your body just… wasn’t ready for it, that’s all.”

Clara could feel the tears brimming in her eyes. “And what if it still isn’t ready, Mama?”

“What if what still isn’t ready?” Levi asked, coming into the kitchen just then. 

Eleanor and Clara broke apart and Clara quickly wiped away her tears. “Oh, just… the turkey! I’m concerned it won’t be ready by the time everything else is.”

When Clara finally faced her husband, she saw the confused, knowing look on his face. He turned to his mother-in-law and said, “Eleanor, would you mind giving us just a moment?”

“Oh yes, of course!” she said, hustling out of the kitchen. 

Levi came and wrapped his wife in a warm, comforting hug. “What’s the matter, my dearest? It isn’t the turkey, I can tell. Did your mother say something to upset you? Or was it your father? If he did anything wrong, I can always let him go from his position.”

Levi’s joke made Clara laugh a little. Unfortunately, though, the motion was too close to crying and it made her start sobbing. Levi pulled her tighter to him.

“Shhhh, shhh, it’s all right my love, everything is fine,” he said in the most soothing tone. “Whatever it is that’s bothering you, we’ll figure it out together. Has someone started sending your mother threatening letters again? If it’s that, we know how to deal with it!”

Levi truly was wonderful at making her laugh. “No, no, it’s not that.” She took her head off his chest and looked into his eyes. She didn’t want to tell him this now. She’d been waiting until she was absolutely sure she could bring this baby into the world… but would she ever be sure? Was there ever going to be a chance they wouldn’t experience that kind of loss again?

“What is it, Clara?” Levi asked lovingly, stroking her cheek with his hand. “Please, tell me so that I can help.”

“It’s…” Clara began but found herself getting choked up. It was as though the words were stuck in her throat and refused to come out. Instead of saying anything, she took Levi’s hand and placed it on her stomach. He looked confused for a moment, but when he realized what she was saying, he broke into a wide grin.

“Oh, darling,” he said, tears rolling down his cheeks, “could it be true? Do we get another chance to have a little one?”

Clara nodded, her hands still shaking. “But Levi, I… I was so frightened to tell you because I thought… I worried I might… What if I lose them again? What if I’m the problem, what if I’m doing something wrong?”

Levi shook his head and kissed her softly. “You did absolutely nothing wrong. You did everything you could to make sure that baby was going to come into the world perfectly healthy and happy, something just accidentally went wrong somewhere along the way. You are the most remarkable, wonderful, caring, careful person I have ever met, and there is no one more deserving of becoming a mother than you. And if, by some cruel twist of fate, this child isn’t destined to be brought into the world either, then we will grieve their loss just as we did with the last one. And then, when and if you’re ready, we’ll keep trying until the Lord hands us the child we were meant to bring into the world.”

“Oh Levi,” she said, her voice catching in her throat as her vision blurred from her tears. “What did I do to deserve you? Thank you so much for saying all of that, you’ve made me feel so… so much more ready to face this pregnancy together. I love you so much.”

“I love you more, my dearest.”

As Levi swept her into his arms to kiss her again, Clara had never been so certain that she and Levi had been brought together by the grace of God. Their relationship, and their child’s life, was going to be living proof that when you live the life God intended for you, beautiful things always happen.

When Levi drew his lips away, he whispered, “Now, how long do I have to wait before I tell Frank that we’re having a baby? Because that man has been asking practically every day since we got married. I think he’s almost more excited that we got together than I am!”

Clara laughed so hard she nearly cried. When she was able to compose herself again, she said, “Well, I think we should give it at least another month. Do you think you’ll be able to wait that long?”

Levi shrugged and grinned at her. “I can wait as long as you need me to my dear. I’m getting all the happiness I need out of just being with you.”

He held out his hand to her and Clara took it. They strode back out to join the rest of their family . As she sat next to her wonderful husband and put a hand on her growing baby as she spoke with her relatives and friends, Clara finally felt like everything was going to be just fine after all. She had her parents, she had her friends, she had her faith in the Lord, and she had the love of her life with another love growing inside her. That was all she would ever need to be happy.

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OFFER: A BRAND NEW SERIES AND 2 FREEBIES FOR YOU!

Grab my new series, "Hearts of the Untamed West", and get 2 FREE novels as a gift! Have a look here!

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